old and tired

So I can't work overnights anymore. I'm exhausted. All the time. And I feel particularly shitty about this because I really dig my job and my coworkers. But being tired all the time (literally all the time) has made me feel crazy; I would even say more crazy than usual.

Emily and I had a long talk about this (as we do most things) and she said that she's never felt so crazy, or so stupid, as right after Eli was born and was refusing to sleep through the night. It's not fun to feel crazy and stupid.

It KILLS ME cause when I worked at the WC, I could (and would) stay up super late and then drink coffee the next day and have it be fine. But now that I actually have a job that requires late nights, I can't do it. After much discussion with Sarah and my therapist, I 've come to the conclusion that I'm no longer in my early 20's. Right. I'm in my late 20's. Nearly 30, some might say. I actually believe that I'm no longer youthful enough to stay up all night, and not worry about catching up on the sleep. And I think I was also suffering from some major untreated depression when I had those sleepless nights. Now that I'm actually happy and healthy, my bod needs time to process those good emotions. Interesting. So this is what being healthy feels like...

So there's a full time, day time position opening here - do I apply? I know there's a huge difference between part time and full time shelter work. I need advice from folks who have worked in shelters far longer than I have. Which just happens to be nearly everyone who reads this blog...